Love & Rage

I wanna write you…
but truth is—
I damn near wanna fight you.

Wanna scream your name so the whole block hears it,
then block you so I ain’t gotta see you.

I got a million words sitting on my chest,
but every time I let ‘em loose,
I regret it.
So I choke ‘em back.
Silence.
Hell—what’s one more day?

But then tomorrow comes,
and the ache don’t quit.
It gnaws.
It shakes.
Got my soul trembling,
body twitching like it’s tryna escape.

You knew what was on the line.
You still played.
Wasted my time.
You knew how I felt—
that in my mind
you would always be mine.

But love swerved left.
Now my heart sits burning,
in an invisible urn.
I know karma’s clock runs circles—
clock it—your turn.

I pray it doesn’t.
I really do.
But some nights—
I wanna cock back Cupid’s bow,
lace that arrow with venom,
and shoot it straight through you.

Carpe diem.

I love you.
And I hate you.
In the same goddamn breath.

One second I’m itching to text,
to call,
to see what’s next—


The next second—
I say screw you
with my whole chest.

And still—
my fingers hover over your name.

~Kae Jaye~